Celebrating 2020 🎉

A year ago today I was admitted to the hospital. December 9, 2019 I had over 20 seizures in one night. I’ve never had A seizure in my life, so even having one, was life changing.

In the months to follow, I would be in and out of the hospital due to countless seizures and all of the complications that came with them. Losing mobility in my legs, arms, speech, and coming to near death moments where I just wanted to give up. Little did I know this would become the domino effect of 2020 for me...

I remember my friends came to visit me in Dallas in October of last year. I remember seeing this sign. It struck one of the deepest cores of my soul. Though I had no clue what it meant then... I would soon find out.

In January I had to make one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make... I left my job as a teacher to tend to my health concerns....I remained unemployed for 8 months, but never missed a meal or a bill!

I found the courage to grieve and face some uncomfortable truths about my marriage.

It has been a seat of shame, condemnation, embarrassment, frustration, confusion, betrayal, anger, grief, and immense pain.

The one thing I said I would NEVER do; divorce was the exact thing I had to do!

It has been both a burden and a blessing. It has been the seat of brokenness and breakthrough.

It has been a seat of victory, revelation, and freedom!!!! The fact that I even have the courage to share this right now is a blessing! - I am surviving and thriving. I am also being made whole, physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, and most importantly in my worth!

I thought this year would be the year from hell. I cant think of anyone it hasn't been hard for.... But I have found so much to celebrate in spite of...

I came home at a time when I was healing and then given the opportunity to care for my mother. I have not only seen God work miraculously in her body, but He has brought our family closer.

I have even been blessed enough to spend time with family I haven't seen in years.

I began chapter 28 of my own life, while Celebrating being a mother for 6 years!!!

I was pushed to face some hard truths about what one sided friendships can look like when you’re enduring hard times....I am gradually finding tools to show up for those who have constantly shown up for me. I have been pushing myself to stay in spaces where I am loved and valued. I am honestly so blessed to have the friends/Sisters that I do; Amanda, Adreka, Anna, Jaz, Portia, Bre, Earlena, Jillian, Taylor, V.. I love you!!!

The names are endless, from my family, my brothers, godparents, my mentors, my counselor, coworkers I am so grateful!!!

I also did the unthinkable....

I ordered proof copies of my first book, received the most valuable feedback any new author could receive, and then I submitted my book for publishing in November!

I started teaching again.... Yes, during one of THE most stressful times to be a teacher... and while I would love to give you a list of reasons why.... I am simply grateful to have a job... This time last year, I wasn't even sure if I would ever teach again.

I also have so many skills I can add to my resume! :)

And speaking of answered prayers.... These people right here are definitely it!!! They have truly loved me back to life!

This city girl picked up an adventure unimaginable.,. I’ve Hiked more this year than ever... and I actually love it. Thank you Anna and Adreka for pushing me out of my comfort zone even if it meant showing up to my house and throwing me in your car :)

Still blogging ....still writing.. and still being the best mother I can possibly be

Ive spent more time this year seeking revelation (God's revealed truth about everything I have been through) and re-solidifying my identity in that truth!

ITS BEEN A DAILY FIGHT!!!!!

BUT I AM STRONGER THAN EVER!!!

Like many of you 2020 has been THE hardest year of my life... I hit every low and just when I thought it couldn’t get any lower... it did!!! I HAD to lose everything to find me again. I’m not about to sit here and declare that 2021 Will be my year. ( But Im hopeful :) If 2020 has taught me anything it is that God is clearly in control!

What I can declare is that no matter where I am, I can be fruitful, intentional, and full of grace right where I am...

I can live in my triggers or trade it for truth.

I can wake up depressed or deflate it with the authority I know I have!

I can grieve tragedy through the lens of defeat or I can grip on to grace.

I can leave every piece of 2020 where it is.... broken ,useless, and reminiscent of failure... or I can rebuild, piece by piece and live as the greatest masterpiece reminiscent of grace and Gods glory.

Some things have to be experienced before they can be expressed. I’ve been close to some, and distant from others but this is the only way to express where I am.

I am

Still growing

Still healing

Still going to counseling

Still rebuilding

Still taking it day by day and sometimes minute by minute

And I am Still Lia

Openly and freely yours,

Lia